People are obviously living longer than ever and are healthier as well, but do I want to be in my 60’s when my son graduates? Will it bother me when the time comes that people start thinking I’m his grandma? Am I okay with the chance that I probably won’t see my grandkids grow up? Will my children have to take care of me when they are in their 20’s or 30’s? These are all scenarios that you have to consider for yourself, but what about the kids?
Will THEY be okay with knowing that they have the oldest parents in the their class? How will they cope with losing their parents earlier in life than other kids? Will they be even more embarrassed about introducing their mom and dad to their friends? As hurtful as these questions are, at some point, they will come up.
Weighing the pros and cons of having kids later in life can drive you crazy. If you are healthy, young at heart and financially well off, then your decision is much easier to make, but what if you aren’t?
Life is short and there is nothing like having kids, but part of being a grown-up is making grown-up choices that we sometimes don’t want to make. Whether you decide to go for it and get pregnant or even consider an alternate route of adoption, ask yourself the hard questions. Honest answers will help you figure out what road is the right one to take.
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These are tough tough questions, and something that concerns me when I read about some of the technology advances that facilitate biological motherhood in the 50s.
I'm fortunate. I have two healthy children. I can't imagine what it must be like if - as you say - you're in your 40s, healthy, financially stable, and want to have a baby.
But as an "older mother" with teens - and solo (never my intention), I know what it does to your health, to your life, and certainly, to your wallet. Perhaps more importantly - what about the kids?
I agree - the decision is easier with health, support, money. And yet...
http://dailyplateofcrazy.com/2011/05/16/tic-toc-goes-the-clock-women-freezing-their-eggs/
Interesting article. I am 44 years old, never married, educated African American female. Finding a suitable spouse is VERY DIFFICULT and I don't want to be a "baby mama" and contribute to the 70% out of wedlock births in the African American community. Unfortunately, African American women are invited to more baby showers than weddings and the only "ring" they get is a ring around the bath tub from men who won't marry them. It's really sad. I hope and pray constantly that God will send me a good man and that I can get married SOON. I only have maybe 2-3 years max to have a baby so I feel that clock ticking away and it's not a good feeling. Thanks for the article.
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